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Z is for Zen

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I’ve been working on some articles about meditation and brainwave entrainment, because when you’re diagnosed with a terminal illness, you are pretty much willing to do anything to get yourself back to a place of health. It’s true that you bargain and you pray (even if you’re not a believer) and hope something will change, a miracle will occur, something, anything, to change that diagnosis.

And meditation, practicing gratitude, being healthy, eating right, exercising in safe ways for my conditions, and just basically doing all the things I wish I had done before I ever got sick. Now, don’t get me wrong, my illnesses aren’t directly related to my not taking care of myself, but I can’t help but wonder if I had been healthier, eaten better, exercised more, practice more meditation, reached my personal state of zen, whatever zen might be, if I might have avoided getting sick.

But we can’t live our lives by what ifs. We just can’t. (more…)

Y is for Yay!

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medicare_card_largerWell, I finally got the paperwork in the mail. It’s official: Come November 1, I will have insurance. Medicare, to be exact. After all these years of struggling to make ends meet, to pay for hundreds of dollars of medication each month (minimum is about $250 and usually around $450 monthly just for meds and oxygen), and at least another $600 per month in doctor’s visits, I’m finally going to have some help paying those bills. My average monthly cost for 2013 has been $2200 per month, which is down from 2012, at $2800 per month. Who ever said I was cheap?

It’s more than that, though. There are tests I’ve needed, medications that might make me feel better and improve my quality of life, and doctor’s appointments I needed to go to but didn’t want to have to pay for… insurance means an end to that. It means I’ll be able to get the tests I need to get the diagnoses that allude us. It means I’ll get the drugs that can make me feel better and improve my quality of life. It means I can go to the doctor when I need to not just when I feel I can afford to do it. It means a lot of good things. Mostly, it means choice. I get choices now, instead of choices being made for me. (more…)

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